Late in my college career I discovered I was missing a GUR (General University Requirement). Panicked, I jumped into the first available class - one that would fulfill the prereq, allow me to graduate on time, but most importantly, was easy.
Enter Sociology 101.
Mrs. McNally's Soc 101 class was not for slacking seniors looking to coast their way to tassels and diplomas. McNally was well aware that any senior in her class was not there because of their passion for social, racial, and gender issues. So the professor treated seniors with, perhaps, more attention than they deserved...especially with her red pen.
Her projects were formidable. Her grading was harsh. Her tests were traps.
Yours truly was on the cutting edge of failure...until I wrote the following paper. Ladies and gentlemen, please consider for your reading pleasure, my unedited, unfiltered, and unprepared Soc 101 grade saver:
Norm Violation: Stall Struggles
Public restrooms are awkward. Restrooms are places we go to do our private business. Public restrooms are places we go to do our private business publicly.
There is quite a contradiction in that definition, thus the use of a public restroom is awkward. However, awkward does not mean you are breaking a social norm: everyone has to do it, and if you are unlucky enough to have to do it while out, it is very socially acceptable.
Less socially acceptable activities include flatulence, tinkling in the toilet, and plopping a poopy into the deep water of a large bowl. These noises may cause neighboring bathroom goers to wince or giggle, but these noises are still allowed.
Our group of three, Blake, Ben and I, decided to attempt using uncommon bathroom noises to violate social norms. The project design was to have one of us sit in a toilet stall and make grunting and groaning noises every time another man entered the public restroom on the second floor of the UC. The grunts and groans simulated us struggling with a major turd. In order to gauge the reactions from our poor victims, one of the group members would join the target at the urinals and wash hands at the sink with them too. The third group member would watch the reaction of the exiting target. These roles would rotate as we saw fit for gathering as much data as we needed.
Reactions varied drastically among our sample of college-aged men. There was everything from laughing to non reaction. One man who did laugh found the noises, produced by Blake, gave him common ground with Ben to the point where they were able to strike up a conversation:
“That has to be a joke,” he said.
Ben smiled politely and giggled along with the target. The laughing was kept to a minimum, presumably because the target did not want the noise norm violator, Blake, to hear him. Had this been a real situation, the laughter could have been taken as disapproval from peers and these feelings might lead to a confrontation.
I was able to experience the post of potty-sitter at least twice. In both situations I would begin with soft noises, such as coughing, and gradually get louder to what might be deemed as a normal grunting voice.
My first target was a non reaction. The man used the urinal while Blake used the one next to him. Nothing happened; according to Blake the man did not make even the slightest hint that something was wrong. He washed his hands and left promptly. I found this reaction to be what might be expected of someone trying to avoid the awkwardness of pointing out the violation of a social norm (the very action of pointing out a violation is a violation of a norm itself). This response could also have been a result of the two different people operating at the urinal post. In the very first situation, where we had Ben in place, the other man and Ben shared a smile at the urinals before conversation began about the difficulty the stall stalker, Blake, was having. This smile by Ben was perceived, perhaps, as a sign of understanding and an approval of any conversation to come about the noise disturbance.
Now, compare Ben’s smile to Blake’s straight face. Blake did not make an invitation to the target, and thus the target possibly did not feel comfortable being the only one pointing out the norm violation.
My second time on the pot was a unique experience. The target was a friend of mine, so I felt comfortable interviewing him afterwards.
Mike, my friend, walked into the restroom and I followed close behind him. Luckily he went into one of the stalls so he could not see me go into the one along side his. As before I coughed and groaned, but I also moved my feet slightly with the noises. This foot movement showed that I was really having a hard time dominating my bowel movement. Apparently, Mike had enough of my stall antics after only a couple of minutes because he stood up, zipped up, and was out of there within a timeframe that makes me question his own success on the porcelain throne.
After some time had passed, and the restroom emptied, I ran out to find Mike and interview him. I caught up to him on the other side of the UC in the Old Main Market. He was with his girlfriend, Kate, and they were shopping for snacks when I approached them. I said hello to both of them with a large goofy grin on my face that must have given my intentions away; immediately Mike looked to my feet to inspect my shoes.
“I knew it had to be you,” he said. (Earlier that evening I had explained to both Mike and Kate that I would be doing a norm violation paper for Soc 101. I had also informed them that it would involve the restroom in the UC. However, neither of them knew which norm I would be violating.)
“What were you thinking?” I asked.
Mike started but Kate interrupted him, “He just got through saying that ‘someone was having a real rough time in there.’”
“Well how did you feel, Mike?” I asked.
“I just felt your pain, man,” he said.
Mike “feeling my pain” was a form of empathy. This turbulent turd experience was a relatable one for Mike, but despite his empathy towards me, he was still having a chuckle about it with his girlfriend on the outside.
As for my attitude and feeling towards the whole situation, it was a real kick in the pants (no pun intended). I had a fun time pretending to have a not so enjoyable dookie debacle. My attitude, however, was largely affected by my hidden identity. Stalls allow one to hide everything but their feet, so it is a more comfortable experience breaking a norm under these conditions. I doubt I would have been as brazen if I had been standing at the urinals making a similar commotion (though I doubt very much that anyone could really struggle as hard urinating compared to defecating).
Public restrooms are awkward by nature, but to use one is not to violate a norm (rather, a less than desirable series of events have occurred to force the user into a world of uncleanliness and foot-tapping). The use of stalls and urinal guards helps to lessen the tension within this world. And perhaps the age-old knowledge gleaned from our kindergarten years gives us the strength to endure the clash of public and private: Everybody Poops.
Amazingly this two page poop joke earned me an A+ and saved my college career from a Van Wilder experience.
xoxo,
ShavedGolf
Amazingly this two page poop joke earned me an A+ and saved my college career from a Van Wilder experience.
xoxo,
ShavedGolf
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