Wednesday, March 30, 2011

One Year Old(er)

Due to my recent increase in years old, I thought it prudent for me to make a bucket list for my twenties.  Let's face it: I'm 25, halfway through my twenties, so I'm pretty much dead.  There are things I must get in order prior to the death of all that is fun and holy.

This list is serious business - none of that travel to Europe or bungee jump bullshit.  I'm talking about stuff that just needs to get done.  Let's begin.

Top Ten Bucket List for a Twenty-Something
  1. Dutch oven a bedmate and convince her she did it.  I mean really convince her.  I want her to leave embarrassed.
  2. Get the company president/CEO with the timeless "smells like updog" gag.  I'll probably have a job afterwards...
  3. Meet Justin Bieber.
  4. LARP - Live Action Role Play.  Because, despite my best efforts, I haven't quite reached the level of nerdom that these guys have...Lightning Bolt!
  5. Master the art of the mustache.  No...none of that Vote for Pedro peach fuzz.  I'm talking full on Civil War.
  6. Do the Dougie.
  7. Use "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn" in an equally dramatic and awesome way.  And I still refuse to watch that movie...it's freaking seven hours long!
  8. Run a marathon.  Watch people run a marathon.  I'll sit along the course, sip a beer (maybe seven or eight), and heckle.
  9. Ride a unicycle into my high school reunion.  Because nothing says "winning" like a dork on one wheel.
  10. Touch Natalie Portman.  Not like casually graze... preferably...an inappropriate one.  Yeah, yeah...she's married...she's a mom...I'm a terrible person. 
xoxo,
ShavedGolf
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4 comments:

  1. CoreyMarch 30, 2011 at 11:34 PM

    Also, I would to say that you will fail at all of these. Including the dougie, you cant dance. You best chance is #1. With some minor changes, he will never believe you, because it would smell like latex. so I guess that wouldn't really be possible either... :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. EmilyMarch 31, 2011 at 8:51 AM

    Ok, first of all, Natalie Portman is not married, only engaged. I would like to put money on the notion that she will likely never marry her baby daddy, as there is drama around how they got together/knocked up.

    Secondly, I would like to cordially invite your heckling ass to the Vancouver Marathon and Half Marathon on June 19th. I will only be partaking in the half, but you could get your heckle on while a few of your coworkers are on course.

    ReplyDelete
  3. JesMarch 31, 2011 at 7:19 PM

    Classic Adam! How I love this . . .

    ReplyDelete
  4. KatieApril 1, 2011 at 6:32 PM

    i like what corey said

    ReplyDelete

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